Encouraging Photo Dump

SO if you are a reader you know that lately I have been in a funk. I have been dealing with A LOT. I have been feeling guilty about not going to the gym like I should, not being June Cleaver (that is the really domestic perfect housewife right? If not you get it), being stuck at a certain weight, blogging (because sometimes I do it from home and the Mr. rolls his eyes), feeling like a bad parent... You know all the regular crap us mommys feel. No this is  not another Debbie Downer post I was simply setting the back drop...

In an effort to cheer up I decided lets go get the hair done. All women feel better when we feel we look better I am no exception. So I head out to a trendy spot 30 minutes from home to my stylist...

Lunatic Fringe

They gave me Voss water, they also had coffee and coke products

Curls!!!!!

But that fix was only temporary... all those negative things were back in my mind and left me looking like this...

This was me mentally abusing myself thinking of every failure as well as the above mentioned things while looking at my house look like we just moved yesterday...

Why is this not hung up?

So I decided hey loser get off your fat ass and stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it sooo...

Excuse the clothes on the couch Im not perfect... I honestly feel better about emptying 3 more boxes and hanging some stuff on the wall. I know some of you trendy moms are frowning at my beige walls but  suck it up I live in an apt complex that will charge out the ass for painting the walls soooo beige it is. I may get some of that movers wall paper at a later date or not LOL...

Which left me feeling like this

I wanted to share this because even as a therapist I have bad days, weeks, and mood swings. Sure I know techniques to help manage my moods but using those techniques is work, and lets be all the way real when yo are feeling down you don't want to work. Its ok. What is not ok is to stay in the funk. Somehow you have to find the strength to fix what is causing you sadness No one can improve your state of being but you (and you Higher Power as you understand him)....

Let me leave you with some pics:

Us at mini me soccer practice

My shirt and bag came in the mail!!!

My babe not wanting to take pictures... :(

No pictures just real words

I know I know I promised Wellness Wednesday would return but I’m not feeling very wellnessy (technical term) right now. I’m not 100% sure whats happening with me but I do know this:

Every daycant be all lose weight, smile, life is great so here it is... Some raw emotions...

I am mad. There are a million reasons why I could be mad, but not one reason sticks out in my mind. Nothing per say triggered this flash of anger, or maybe it was the combination of EVERYTHING. By that I mean EVERYTHING. Money, moving, wedding, combining houses, job, school, weight, lack of gym motivation, fear of that she-devil scale, car issues, LIFE, EVERYTHING.

What I am sure of is the evil looks from the Mr. (who is sick and usually supportive) did not help this angry brew storm I feel. Ok Im a bit of a pack rat. You knew that when we moved. Im easily frustrated and don’t want to talk about it. This was evident in the beginning as well. So I break a cheap ass bookshelf and the look from him was like hell was coming down to swallow us up, or like I called his moma a bitch. The bookshelf was totally repairable, and if not it was on 15 bucks. You get what you pay for… Which brings me to money. Is there ever enough? Will I ever not have buyers remorse (unless its food). Seriously I bout a $20 dry erase/cork board combo and thought forever about returning it…

In an effort to continue this self improvement I started a while ago Im going to blame my mood on my PCOS, and end this on an up note…. I am blessed. I don’t have half the crap I want but I EVERYTHING I need. I eat dinner, and I sleep in a bed (that will be replaced bc Im a spoiled brat and my dad is buying me furniture). I am loved by a few good people, and I am employed. It is always important to count your blessings and remain grateful even in the storm.

THERE IS NO TESTIMONY WITHOUT A TEST!!!