As I lay here reflefcting and planning my mind is pulled in so many dfferent directions soooo try to stay with me... him, the man I say I'm over. I shrug and say ha ha I'm done with him. I miss him, crave him, and he doesn't care. I miss him everyday and yet I lie and say I'm ok. When does that ish go away? I recognize that it wasn't the healthiest situation and that I deserve better but its him I want.... my friends omg they wear me out too. Its cool because I'm sure I wear them out as well. One friend is lying and being a bitch about money. Granted a couple of her gripes are valid but she is takin things too dam far. Shit get current funds why go after retro? Then there's him...I can't even say because well...eff it I woulnt be me if I didn't... ok him great guy but flawed like the rest of us. You have a small person to raise so stop being a punk and do what you gotta do and be glad she didn't tell her when y'all stopped having sex. I realize that part of the reason she is still spassing out is because real or fake she had hope for the 2 of you and now you are living her dream with someone else.... work omg now they are saying there are no raises [as if my money was funny already] my ends don't meet. Hell at this point I just want them to wave at eachother lol... my dads knee is hurt, my nephew may be beng left home alone, I'm broke, my brother hates me, I'm broke, and I'm stress eating. I've gained 6 pounds in the last week.. dam.... treadmill anyone
*lights candle, sips vodka*
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